How true this is. replied by CrabbyShaSha @ Thu, 14 Aug 2008 23:28:41 +0800

CrabbyShaSha — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 23:28:41 +0800

How true this is. replied by TalkToTheScreen @ Sun, 10 Aug 2008 09:04:05 +0800

TalkToTheScreen — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 09:04:05 +0800

Haha, that's kinda good. Approach her. Create fate. ;D

How true this is. replied by Pippinpro @ Sun, 10 Aug 2008 01:23:41 +0800

Pippinpro — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 01:23:41 +0800

damn it i am stuck at stage 2

How true this is. replied by TalkToTheScreen @ Fri, 08 Aug 2008 18:29:05 +0800

TalkToTheScreen — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 18:29:05 +0800

I think it'll be the same even after many many years. Getting together, knowing each other more, getting to know each other weaknesses, and if they can't accept it, quarrels start.

And, quarrels lead to unhappiness. If that is unresolved, it'll lead to breakup, someday.

Quarrels, although it does cause unhappiness, does make two persons understand each other better. ;D Although it's not really healthy to have frequent quarrels. Accepting each other weaknesses is important. Nobody's perfect.

How true this is. replied by TalkToTheScreen @ Sat, 26 Jul 2008 17:56:12 +0800

TalkToTheScreen — Sat, 26 Jul 2008 17:56:12 +0800

Okay, i will. Thanks. ;D

How true this is. replied by JianLun @ Sat, 26 Jul 2008 12:07:42 +0800

JianLun — Sat, 26 Jul 2008 12:07:42 +0800

=) for a while u might feel lost..

but after some time.. u will know that u have grown emotionally...

trust me... by some way or another... we all learn our lessons in different ways, some of us just learn it by having our hearts broken.. u will learn to move on sooner or later ;)

remember the memories u had rather den clinge on to the pass..

How true this is. replied by TalkToTheScreen @ Wed, 23 Jul 2008 21:14:23 +0800

TalkToTheScreen — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 21:14:23 +0800

Yeah. I understand that life does get a little difficult sometimes.

I'll try to relax and take things easy. :D

How true this is. replied by 00011000 @ Sun, 20 Jul 2008 12:00:08 +0800

00011000 — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 12:00:08 +0800

You seem like a sediment guy. You treasure relationship and feeling. But just some words of advice, if you don’t mind.

It seems like, you are an intellectual guy and, you use analysis and reasoning to gauge your life experience. This will not work for man/woman relationship.

Human being human can be very irrational in his action and reaction. Don’t explain too much, don’t measure too much and don’t rationalise too much about man/woman experience. Many times, life is what it is – to experience it as it comes and not to rationalise too much.

Your approach to life is perfect if man can live forever but heck..... Relax and take things easy. Give yourself a break. Take up a new hobby or join a sport or join a religion org etc.

Life is a journey, sometimes smooth, sometimes bumpy.

How true this is. replied by TalkToTheScreen @ Sat, 19 Jul 2008 12:00:12 +0800

TalkToTheScreen — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 12:00:12 +0800

HA. Thanks. ;D

Hope it helps the people in agony. ;D Don't worry too much. It's all but a cycle.

How true this is. replied by JianLun @ Sat, 19 Jul 2008 11:11:42 +0800

JianLun — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 11:11:42 +0800

hahaha.. it really depends.. =) but this thread really owns... ur the man TS!

How true this is. replied by Eduardo Ratinho @ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 20:13:48 +0800

Eduardo Ratinho — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 20:13:48 +0800

Sick cycle indeed..

How true this is. replied by TalkToTheScreen @ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 17:43:00 +0800

TalkToTheScreen — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 17:43:00 +0800

Yeah. Agreed.

It's like a cycle..

How true this is. replied by Tier @ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 13:21:25 +0800

Tier — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 13:21:25 +0800

repeated

How true this is. replied by Tier @ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 13:21:15 +0800

Tier — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 13:21:15 +0800

wow so very true. you must be thinking alot about this issue.

I used to have 2 friends that went through these stage with me that you mentioned. Now we are strangers, less than friends. rather saddening case. I will rather be friends with them if I know we will end up being back to strangers.

I also feel happier as a single. I had more sad moments than happy moments in my past relationship. I just felt extremely tired from compromising one sided always and always giving.

Love is like a drug I am just addicted to the sweetness in the beginning, when the sweetness ended, I will still crave for it, but it will never be sweet for long and it never come back.

For the time being, being single is the best.

I still do believe in love though. someday~

How true this is. replied by RachelSniper @ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 09:08:58 +0800

RachelSniper — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 09:08:58 +0800

I think you can write a book based on just that. Might evoke some interesting thoughts from more readers.

That is part of growing up for everyone. A time to discover yourself on what you really want.

Do not get overly-depressed because this issue only serves as an experience for you. Move on to the next stage after this because you would never what life has in store for you.

Cheer up and be with those who care for you, friends and family alike.

How true this is. replied by JianLun @ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 00:26:47 +0800

JianLun — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 00:26:47 +0800

so very true.... good post!

How true this is. replied by BaByBoY @ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 00:00:27 +0800

BaByBoY — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 00:00:27 +0800

What you`ve said,
i`m going through…
esp the sad part..

I know that eventually one day, we might still be frens, then fade from there back into strangers, but that`s not how i wanted it to end, neither do i wanna love her from another corner of the world…

I`ve done every possible single thing that could ever been done, but it ended that she can no longer wait for me,
Now, i can only give her my blessings… in fact, i`m realieved that at least someone can give her something that i may nv have a chance to give her again, Happiness..

Love is like that, sometimes, u just want the person to remain happy, and you think you can give it to her.. but when one day u find that in fact u`re giving more hurt and she can find someone else to give her the happiness she deserves, u`ll be willling to let her go? for me, i did try..

No doubt it hurts, it stills do.. but at least i know she`s happy now..

She`s free to choose her happiness, like i`m free to love her.. I still do…

How true this is. replied by TalkToTheScreen @ Mon, 14 Jul 2008 22:00:32 +0800

TalkToTheScreen — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 22:00:32 +0800

Yeah. Haha, single is the way. ;D

Though it does get lonely sometimes..

How true this is. replied by Yohoro @ Mon, 14 Jul 2008 09:05:22 +0800

Yohoro — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 09:05:22 +0800

Originally posted by TalkToTheScreen:

Being single's the best ;D

Power la Single is the best man ... FREEEDOOOMMM ...

but still kinna sad sometimes ....

How true this is. replied by vvclub @ Sun, 13 Jul 2008 21:02:53 +0800

vvclub — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 21:02:53 +0800

agree with you .. however many people sort of know the concept of maintaining a good relationship but its hard because everyone is different, and different strokes work for different folks so the whole dating or marriage process is largely about discovering, experimenting, evaluating, correcting (or give and take). And to have the strength to carry on, to have faith that the relationship will become good. It takes will power and changes to perspectives and expectations as we progress in the relationship. Unfortunately there is no short cuts otherwise we will have a lot more happy couples in this world.

p.s. it is sad to see a report about divorce rate is increasing and the age group is getting younger and younger.

How true this is. replied by Feelingconfused @ Sun, 13 Jul 2008 18:10:27 +0800

Feelingconfused — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 18:10:27 +0800

okay i guess wat u said are quite true

How true this is. replied by TalkToTheScreen @ Sun, 13 Jul 2008 17:46:45 +0800

TalkToTheScreen — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 17:46:45 +0800

Anyways, some are quoted. I didn't type everything.

How true this is. replied by TalkToTheScreen @ Sun, 13 Jul 2008 14:21:46 +0800

TalkToTheScreen — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 14:21:46 +0800

Remember this in any relationship. Nobody is perfect.

Do your part to contribute towards the relationship and keep it going and moving along. Maintain the relationship in every way possible. Work on strengthening your relationship, enriching it, in every way possible, on all levels possible, and in all areas possible (emotional, verbal, psychological, physical, etc.).

The emotional, verbal, and psychological sides of the relationship are really more important than the physical or sexual aspects of the relationship. Work on creating, developing, strengthening, and enriching the emotional foundation or aspect before any physical involvement occurs.

Every couple is different. There is no "right" way to make a relationship work (or a wrong way either). Every couple makes up their own love rules, love habits, love routines, love agreements, etc. Whatever works well for you two, works best for you two.

Do not be completely absorbed in the relationship. Both partners should have their own group of friends, so no one will feel smothered (feel suffocated). At the same time, make room for your partner in your life, relationships are all about balance.

Give and take. Give what you are comfortable with and accept what other can give. Contribute your time and effort without unreasonable expectations in return. When you do good deeds for others, let that be it's own reward so that you don't build resentments.

Share your feelings. Ask for what you want and need. People can’t read your mind. Make your request with a smile be direct don't use hints. Communicate and share your thoughts and feelings with them. Open up and allow them to understand you.

Trust. It's the foundation of any healthy relationships. Remember to keep your promises. Do what you say. Once people trust you, you can have a healthy relationship. And, remember it's better to be happy than to be angry.

Use communication to establish a common ground to understand different points of view and to create a mutual, collaborative agreement or plan. You can either choose to be right, or you can have a successful relationship. You can't always have both. Most people argue to be "right" about something. They say. "If you loved me, you would..." and argue to hear the other say, "Okay, you're right." If you are generally more interested in being right, this approach will not create a healthy relationship. Having a healthy relationship means that you have your experience, and your partner has his or her experience, and you learn to love and share and learn from those experiences. If you can't reach any mutual agreement, that doesn't mean either of you is wrong or bad, it only means you don't suit each other.

Forgive one another. Forgiveness is a decision of letting go the past and focusing on the present. It's about taking control of your current situation. Talk about the issue and try to reach a mutual agreement on how to handle the situation in the future and then commit to it. If you can't reach an agreement, it's a bad sign. If you learn from the past and do not repeat the same pattern, it's a good sign. It's the only way to prevent yourself from more disappointment, anger or resentment. Respect your partner, when your partner tells you to leave them alone, do give him or her the time and space.

Do not call it quits when you do argue. When in a state of anger, we can not rationalize and often find ourselves losing control by saying things we don't mean. Hang in there and try to work it out before finalizing a break-up that you will regret afterwards. That said, if you find you are arguing more and more, examine the possible reasons, and talk it over together.

There is no such thing as a PERFECT relationship. Sure, most of the time you'll be compromising. But don't get shocked or overly depressed because of arguments or fights. This will come for SURE. Without arguments and fights, your relationship will NOT grow stronger.

How true this is. replied by 00king00 @ Sat, 12 Jul 2008 19:37:43 +0800

00king00 — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 19:37:43 +0800

a thoughtful and excellent analysis

happy endings are not as simple as they seem... hope to see input from u regarding how r/s evolve into happy endings -- I like yr analysis, mature and realistic

How true this is. replied by vvclub @ Sat, 12 Jul 2008 01:07:00 +0800

vvclub — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 01:07:00 +0800

i think the results are not as important as the process.

does being singles means not going through the process of loving someone and finally become heart broken? If so, what's the aim of 'being'??

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