Please can someone tell me something, are there any couples/ppl in their 30's or 40's that dont have any children yet?

I dont mean to be biased or anything but I have found it really difficult to meet people that do not have children.  It seems that when couples reach "certain age" they have a desperate calling to breed.

If there is someone out there that is having the same problem  that I am, it would be good to make friends here.  Though we are not young anymore but we still want to have fun and not sit around talking baby stuff.......

i dont want to have children.

too much responsibility and dont think can afford to have them..

I have friends who are childless.

 

One couple recently celebrated their 23rd wedding anniversary.  As far as I know, they come across a lovely and loving couple.  They keep themselves busy with badminton, karaoke sessions and dancing classes.  Erm, they are my karaoke buddies. :)

Another 2 couples, married over 10 years.  Both couples keep pets and focus their attention to careers and self development.

One other couple in their 60s, also childless but seems to be leading separate lives.  Hubby golfs, wife dances.  But they do do stuff together.  We've know them for 17 years.

One common element is all got plenty of $$$$$.

No need to follow norm.  Just follow your own desire.  Ask yourself, are you ready for the commitment.  It is hugh but then again, the love that you experience?  It's PRICELESS!!!! :)

Good luck with your decision.  Anyways, the decision has to be mutual with your spouse, right?  How does he/she feels?

Originally posted by Ccffsg:

Please can someone tell me something, are there any couples/ppl in their 30's or 40's that dont have any children yet?

I dont mean to be biased or anything but I have found it really difficult to meet people that do not have children.  It seems that when couples reach "certain age" they have a desperate calling to breed.

If there is someone out there that is having the same problem  that I am, it would be good to make friends here.  Though we are not young anymore but we still want to have fun and not sit around talking baby stuff.......

you can request them to PM you better to make it a confidential matter so as to maintain each and everyone's personal classified informations.

my colleague who is 30+ is still playing with his remote control helicopters... don't think he and his wife wants to have kids.

"it is mandate to grow old, but optional to grow up"

do pm me....B-)

its up to the individuals.

if u want a child, then have it

if u dont want, then dont have it

 

There is really nothing wrong these days to go on without kids. just be aware there need a seperate arrangement as you grow old. But anyway these days i think it is unrealistics to assume children will be able to take care of older folks.  

now everything price also up $_$ can born, but cannot afford. later scare the child suffer.

having a baby is a process that has an expiry date...once a couple crosses a certain age, its very hard to get pregnant anymore....my view is if you have any doubts, just have one first...better than spending tens of thousands on all the advanced methods...

janice, that is the most stupid and irresponsible thing i've ever read...

it's a CHILD you're bringing into this world! a human being!

you do NOT do things like that out of convenience!!

wah lau eh!

what the hell are you saying??

Originally posted by Ccffsg:

too much responsibility and dont think can afford to have them..

don't know what to say but i think you will be missing alot. yes. children come with responsibilities but i think it's worth the while. you breed not because of pressure from any quarters but you want it.

Nothing beats the experience. let me share with you some.

my 3 years old boy was jumping and swinging on an MRT and i stop him by telling him i will leave him here. he says cannot. and when i asked him why cannot, he thought for a moment and replied "because I love you."

my new born girl was hospitalised because i was sick before she was born due to work stress and having to attend to the wife and child need. when she was born, she caught the illiness pass on by me. When we brought her to the hospital, the doctor suspect menigitsis and therefore did a lumbar puncture procedure on the baby. while waiting outside, i heard the baby cried and my heart cried too as if i could feel that pain too.

This are some of the little experience but it had been a long time liao

 

 

 

i know this ex colleague who's in her 40s & w/o child..

do envy her though..

she can simply just resigned 1 day~ pack her bags with her husband~ & leave S'pore for their own honeymoon~

lesser financial burden w/o a child oso~

The thought of not having anyone to carry on whatever you have built up or maintained from previous generation down is just...  i dont know... my genes cannot be lost! NEVER!! lol..

My Elder brother got married and decided not to have any children. My mother was jumping up and down for them to have, but they insist that their plans in life is not to have any kids.

My sister on the other hand, has a kid and she wants another one soon. The baby has brought in lots of joy into the family. I love her kid so much if he falls sick, I will be damn worried and will go over to his place to visit. Buy bears for him, though he does not need it... Haha.

This is where I am caught...... In our chinese tradition, not having children is considered as an unfilial act, but in this modern society, this traditional mindset cannot work. Simple put, it collapsed under the advancement. We look into enriching ourselves more, I guess.

Now, my point will be this, are there people out there who will regret that they do not have any kids when they grow old? If they do regret, can do they anything to fix things?

 

 

 

Originally posted by shrekho:

My Elder brother got married and decided not to have any children. My mother was jumping up and down for them to have, but they insist that their plans in life is not to have any kids.

My sister on the other hand, has a kid and she wants another one soon. The baby has brought in lots of joy into the family. I love her kid so much if he falls sick, I will be damn worried and will go over to his place to visit. Buy bears for him, though he does not need it... Haha.

This is where I am caught...... In our chinese tradition, not having children is considered as an unfilial act, but in this modern society, this traditional mindset cannot work. Simple put, it collapsed under the advancement. We look into enriching ourselves more, I guess.

Now, my point will be this, are there people out there who will regret that they do not have any kids when they grow old? If they do regret, can do they anything to fix things?

  

I guess there are those who adopt, shower love on their friend's children or their siblings children or do charity work dedicated to kids?

can I ask are there peole who have children then later on regret? or no one ever regret having their children?

I think...i will only think of having children...when i'm more confident that i can raise him / her up .... i want to make sure i have everything i need at least he basics before considering having a babe...i don't want my kid to suffer because of my incompetance

Originally posted by Ccffsg:

can I ask are there peole who have children then later on regret? or no one ever regret having their children?

Well I believe there are people who regret not having children later on, and those who don't

It's highly up to the individual

There is no right or wrong answer

Originally posted by elindra:

I guess there are those who adopt, shower love on their friend's children or their siblings children or do charity work dedicated to kids?

For my brother and sis-in-law, I doubt so ba..... since they love to travel. They took a photograph of an old couple from the west travelling around in Japan and gave a comment that says," will we still be able to travel around the world like this 2 when we are at their age?"

 

Originally posted by Ccffsg:

can I ask are there peole who have children then later on regret? or no one ever regret having their children?

how do you regret? it's not as if the stuff can be returned or disposed if it does not suit you or you don't like it. therefore i agree with bear and the rest that careful consideration be given.

for me, and being chinese, i think that the way to repay for parent is to be filial and to be a parent myself since i have decided to marry.

anyway, i felt very happy when my 1st child is a boy(chinese mentality again) but happier that both the child and mother are healthy

Originally posted by the Bear:

janice, that is the most stupid and irresponsible thing i've ever read...

it's a CHILD you're bringing into this world! a human being!

you do NOT do things like that out of convenience!!

wah lau eh!

what the hell are you saying??

can we ban bimbos from tis forum? *roll eyes*

 

anw childbearing is not just abt expiry date! in her view, marriage is prob the same. u HAVE to be married by wat age, have a kid by wat age... tis is wat society says, but it is NOT society tat's gonna be in TAT marriage or raise TAT kid....

 

if u want a kid, have it... if not, don't. both have its consequences... make ur OWN decision and live by it... (and pls dun come here to whine after tat)...

 

i can only say, i'm GLAD i din have a kid... having bubble is more than enuff wahahahahahaa

yeah I know a ex-colleague.

Nowadays women with kids brandish their kids like trophies and expect everyone to give way to them like they own the world. You can see the bloody attitude right on their faces thay they feel entitled to some special treatment

Dun bring the child into the world if u cant commit. 

 

Dun do it bcos it's the "norm", if u do, the one suffers in the end will be ur children.  Just look at the raising numbers of abandon  / abused kids..Wat have they done to deserve such treatments?  Of cos our parents will volunteer to help us to look after our kids, but then again..we cant always rely on others to raise our kids, they r ours afterall..

I wll love to opt for international adoption if my finance is not a prob...tho' i wld still love to try havin babies of my own, i hope to share the love with the kids who suffer as well.

My point is simple.  & I shall repeat : Do NOT bring the child into the world if either party cannot compromise to commit.